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Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Warning: Spoiler Alert

I was watching that “I see dead people” movie years ago when this so-called friend called me up and asked me what I was doing. I said I’m watching this movie with Bruce Willis in it, and there's this kid who sees dead people.
He said, “Oh yeah. Saw that. Bruce Willis is the ghost.” Then he laughed. I played it cool, but I was seething. I thought of Cthulhu and considered summoning him. 
I don’t remember what he said afterwards, what he called me up for, or even what we talked about, but every time I see him (which is about once or twice a year, thank heavens) I imagine him being gnawed on by a good-sized rancor.
I remembered this incident because I just finished reading “Fight Club,” Chuck Palahniuk’s novel. Nobody called me up to spoil anything for me, but I did see this shirt on some website:

This shirt is diabolical
I was only on the first few pages of the book when I saw this, so the whole time I was reading, this was flashing on my head, like a neon sign: Tyler Durden is not real Tyler Durden is not real. Over and over.
Didn’t matter, though—I had a good time reading the book. Still, it would have been quite an experience had I not known that bit about Tyler Durden.
I've read years ago George RR Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire, and I could have revealed massive spoilers to my friends when the TV series came out. But I didn't (pats myself on the back). I'm awesome that way.
Unlike my good-only-as-rancor-food former friend, who, had he been a book reader, would not have hesitated to call up (or text) every one he knows and tell them about Ned Stark or about The Red Wedding. Thank god the only thing he reads are labels on cheap gin bottles. 

Spoilers like these probably won’t affect the price of rice in the Philippines, but for someone like me who still feels galactically pissed off at that TV executive who cancelled Firefly, it can be infuriating. These little things can all add up. 
And they all comeback to bug you at three in the morning.

Friday, October 24, 2014

Typhoons and Earthquakes in the Philippines

The Philippines has more than its fair share of disasters, and not because the country is particularly cursed or anything, but because the entire archipelago—purportedly composed of 7,100 islands—lies on a region in the Pacific Ocean called the “Ring of Fire” (actually, the area is shaped more like a horseshoe, although to be fair, “The Horseshoe of Fire” doesn’t have the same impact as the “Ring of Fire”). About 40,000 kilometers long, the “ring” runs from the southern tip of South America, up along the coast of North America, across the Bering Strait, down through Japan, the Philippines, Indonesia (the Ring of Fire’s western edge extends into the Indian Ocean), and to New Zealand.  The “Fire” part of the Ring of Fire is because a string of 452 volcanoes dot this line, like a malevolent game of connect-the-dots.

The regions along this line experience volcanic eruptions and periodic earthquakes—majority of them small, hardly-felt tremors, and the few devastating ones that kill thousands and cause tsunamis that can kill even more.
Besides being right on the edge of the Ring of Fire, the Philippines is also practically next door to an area in the Pacific where typhoons regularly spawn.
And, as luck would have it, the country is right in the typhoons’ path—a sort of doormat for typhoons as they make their way towards the Asian mainland.

This means that besides molten rocks and earthquakes, the Philippines also experiences weapons-grade winds that can tear down homes, uproot trees, cause storm surges, as well as torrential rains that can trigger flashfloods, landslides, and destroy crops and properties.
Approximately 80 typhoons develop in this region yearly, and about 19 enter the Philippine Area of Responsibility (PAR). About six to nine of these typhoons make landfall, making the Philippines the country most exposed to typhoons.   
No wonder our country is among the world’s most disaster-prone countries.


Right On Top of Plates

Tectonic plates, I mean.
These are part of the Earth’s mantle—massive, irregularly shaped slabs of solid rock just under the planet’s surface, upon which large section of the Earth rests. They are called tectonic plates by scientists.
There are about 8 major plates, and dozens of smaller ones, each carrying a piece of the world on top, making our planet seem like a gigantic jigsaw puzzle.
Tectonic plates vary greatly, from a few hundred to thousands of kilometers across. The Pacific Plate and the Antarctic Plates are the largest. Each plate’s thickness also varies, ranging from less than 15 kilometers to about 200 kilometers or more. The plates constitute the lithosphere, which is a layer of rock on the top of the Earth’s mantle.

Beneath the lithosphere is a partially molten rock layer called asthenosphere. Driven by forces from deep beneath the earth, the plates slowly move across the planet’s surface, interacting with other plates, diverging, colliding, and slipping past each other. The edges of these plates, where they bump and grind against other plates, are the sites where earthquakes commonly happen, and where many volcanoes are active.
These movements also influence the form of the planet’s surface. Where the plates meet, mountain-building occurs—besides earthquakes, volcanic activity, and oceanic trench formation.
According to the plate tectonics theory, Earth’s outer shell is divided into several plates that glide over the rocky inner layer above the core called the mantle. Actually a modern version of Alfred Wegener’s Continental Drift Theory first proposed in 1912, this theory explains how the Earth’s continents move around the planet. Tectonic plates probably developed very early in the Earth’s 4.6-billion-year history. They have been drifting since, pressing against each other, then separating again, like some fiery and explosive dance that has been going on since the beginning of time, in the process forming and shaping the world as we know it.
The plates move about the same rate as the growth of your fingernails, so the world that we know today is different from what it was millions and millions of years ago. And millions and millions of years from now, the world will wear a face unrecognizable to us.
Most of the boundaries between individual plates are hidden beneath the oceans, so they cannot be seen. They can be accurately mapped, however, from outer space by measurements from satellites. 
Plates change over time, like many features on the surface of the Earth. Plates that are composed of denser materials, like an oceanic lithosphere, can sink under a lighter continental plate, and can eventually disappear completely. There are actually plates that are in danger of disappearing.
The Philippines, as we have mentioned, is in the Pacific Ring of Fire, where the oceanic Philippine Plate and a few much smaller plates are subducting, or sliding under, along the Philippine Trench. Moreover, scientists consider the Philippine Sea plate as unusual, because almost all the boundaries of the surrounding plates are converging.
This means that the country is being squeezed by two large tectonic plates—the Pacific Plate and the Eurasian Plate.

Note: This is an excerpt from my forthcoming book, "Disaster Management for Filipinos"

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Harnessing the Anger of Trolls

"If you want to do something evil, put it in something boring."- John Oliver

John Oliver, host of the HBO comedy show “Last Week Tonight with John Oliver,” made one of the most brilliant rants in the history of internet. Not only was it funny and made people laugh, but it also made them outraged about something a great majority are clueless and apathetic about: net neutrality

The rant was directed against the US Federal Communications Commission’s proposed net neutrality regulations, which was deemed so egregious it forced activists and corporations to be on the same side. The FCC, however, invited the public to post their comments on their website.
And this made Mr. Oliver appeal directly to the trolls and lurkers and other internet commenters out there to “seize their moment” and let their outrage show using their most potent weapon: the keyboard.
   "For once in your life, we need you to channel that anger, that badly spelled bile that you normally reserve for unforgivable attacks on actresses you seem to think have put on weight...or politicians that you disagree with...or photos of your ex-girlfriends getting on with their lives...or non-white actors getting the part of fictional characters... We need you to get out there and for once in your lives, focus your indiscriminate rage in a useful direction. Seize your moment, my lovely trolls. Turn on caps lock and fly my pretties, fly! Fly! Fly!"
Is John Oliver’s call on internet commenters as rousing as Theoden’s speech to the Rohirrim, as stirring as Churchill’s “Finest Hour” speech to the British? Well, I wouldn't go that far, but it apparently worked. FCC’s website “experienced technical problems” after thousands upon thousands of faceless commenters flooded the website with their outraged comments. Website's up now, but the point was made.
They heard you, John Oliver.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Nothing To Lose

I was reading this article about a so-called “healing priest” and it struck me that even in the 21st century, people are still gullible enough to trust “faith healers.”
There are a lot of reasons for this (poverty and miseducation among them), but in this day and ageyou’d think that people would think twice about trusting those who claim to heal all kinds of diseases through prayers and faith alone. Mind you, the “healers” would make it clear that their healing powers did not come from them, but from a “higher power.” These mysterious power source would range from the Baby Jesus (or the adult one), “Mama Mary,” from a magical dwarf (I’m not kidding), a mysterious hermit, or even from an old lady who claims to be a reincarnation of Jesus.
Filipinos lap these up. Even today, there are many people in the country's rural areas that still believe in anting-anting (amulets). It’s not a coincidence that people in areas that are mired in poverty and with low literacy rates are the ones that have the most superstitious beliefs. But even those who are supposed to be college-educated also believe in all sorts of anting-antings and in the supernatural and the paranormal. 
Like these faith healers. Although many had been revealed as nothing but con men and charlatans, they are still flourishing in this country. What's more, they do not lack for patrons, even from those who are "educated," and from the middle class.
Maybe it’s also a cultural thing? The inhabitants of the Philippines after all practiced a form of animism and other indigenous beliefs during pre-colonial times. Believing in magic healers is not that too great a leap for a people who, until now, believe in kulam
There are also those who turn to faith healers as a result of desperation. "What have we get to lose?" is often what they tell themselves to justify their decision to trust these sleazy purveyors of false hopes. But it is this attitude, this desperation, that these con men count on.
And, it pains me to admit this, our inherent gullibility. 

Reading about this healing priest reminded me of James Randi’s Paranormal Challenge, where a million dollars is offered “to anyone who can demonstrate a supernatural or paranormal ability under agreed-upon scientific testing criteria.” 
James Randi, a stage magician, enemy of charlatans, and a "debunker" of fantastic claims, had said: 
"There exists in society a very special class of persons that I have always referred to as the Believers. These are folks who have chosen to accept a certain religion, philosophy, theory, idea or notion and cling to that belief regardless of any evidence that might, for anyone else, bring it into doubt. They are the ones who encourage and support the fanatics and the frauds of any given age. No amount of evidence, no matter how strong, will bring them any enlightenment. They are the sheep who beg to be fleeced and butchered, and who will battle fiercely to preserve their right to be victimized."

The challenge was first offered in 1964, and so far, no one has won the prize.

The article I linked above is about the aborted deal between one of the country’s top corporations and the foundation headed by a certain Father Fernando Suarez, a “healing priest.” The deal was about a 33 hectare land in Cavite (a province a few kilometers south of Manila) to be donated to Fr. Suarez’s foundation.
A Catholic priest, Fr. Suarez had planned to build a giant statue of Mary on the donated land, a statue that, if built, will rival Rio de Janeiro’s Christ the Redeemer in terms of size. This giant statue would reportedly cost about a billion Philippine Pesos (around 22 million USD).
The Philippines is among the poorest countries in the world, and is often ravaged by typhoons and other natural disasters. A statue that would cost this much to build in a country like ours is nothing short of obscene.
This is not just your run-of-the-mill religious devotion; this is fanaticism of the nauseating kind. 

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Writing Tips From Elmore Leonard, Kurt Vonnegut, and Neil Gaiman

Authors have different writing styles. To somebody who is halfway literate, Hemingway’s works are as different from Dan Brown’s as Mozart’s music is from Kenny G’s.
It’s not surprising then that different authors have different writing advice.
Compare the different advice given by these three great authors:

  1. Never open a book with weather.
If it’s only to create atmosphere, and not a character’s reaction to the weather, you don’t want to go on too long. The reader is apt to leaf ahead looking for people. There are exceptions. If you happen to be Barry Lopez, who has more ways to describe ice and snow than an Eskimo, you can do all the weather reporting you want.
  1. Avoid prologues.
They can be annoying, especially a prologue following an introduction that comes after a foreword. But these are ordinarily found in nonfiction. A prologue in a novel is backstory, and you can drop it in anywhere you want.
There is a prologue in John Steinbeck’s Sweet Thursday, but it’s O.K. because a character in the book makes the point of what my rules are all about. He says: “I like a lot of talk in a book and I don’t like to have nobody tell me what the guy that’s talking looks like. I want to figure out what he looks like from the way he talks. . . . figure out what the guy’s thinking from what he says. I like some description but not too much of that. . . . Sometimes I want a book to break loose with a bunch of hooptedoodle. . . . Spin up some pretty words maybe or sing a little song with language. That’s nice. But I wish it was set aside so I don’t have to read it. I don’t want hooptedoodle to get mixed up with the story.”
  1. Never use a verb other than “said” to carry dialogue.
The line of dialogue belongs to the character; the verb is the writer sticking his nose in. But said is far less intrusive than grumbled, gasped, cautioned, lied. I once noticed Mary McCarthy ending a line of dialogue with “she asseverated,” and had to stop reading to get the dictionary.
  1. Never use an adverb to modify the verb “said” …
…he admonished gravely. To use an adverb this way (or almost any way) is a mortal sin. The writer is now exposing himself in earnest, using a word that distracts and can interrupt the rhythm of the exchange. I have a character in one of my books tell how she used to write historical romances “full of rape and adverbs.”
  1. Keep your exclamation points under control.
You are allowed no more than two or three per 100,000 words of prose. If you have the knack of playing with exclaimers the way Tom Wolfe does, you can throw them in by the handful.
  1. Never use the words “suddenly” or “all hell broke loose.”
This rule doesn’t require an explanation. I have noticed that writers who use “suddenly” tend to exercise less control in the application of exclamation points.
  1. Use regional dialect, patois, sparingly.
Once you start spelling words in dialogue phonetically and loading the page with apostrophes, you won’t be able to stop. Notice the way Annie Proulx captures the flavor of Wyoming voices in her book of short storiesClose Range.
  1. Avoid detailed descriptions of characters.
Which Steinbeck covered. In Ernest Hemingway’s Hills Like White Elephants what do the “American and the girl with him” look like? “She had taken off her hat and put it on the table.” That’s the only reference to a physical description in the story, and yet we see the couple and know them by their tones of voice, with not one adverb in sight.
  1. Don’t go into great detail describing places and things.
Unless you’re Margaret Atwood and can paint scenes with language or write landscapes in the style of Jim Harrison. But even if you’re good at it, you don’t want descriptions that bring the action, the flow of the story, to a standstill.
And finally:
  1. Try to leave out the part that readers tend to skip.
A rule that came to mind in 1983. Think of what you skip reading a novel: thick paragraphs of prose you can see have too many words in them. What the writer is doing, he’s writing, perpetrating hooptedoodle, perhaps taking another shot at the weather, or has gone into the character’s head, and the reader either knows what the guy’s thinking or doesn’t care. I’ll bet you don’t skip dialogue.
My most important rule is one that sums up the 10.
If it sounds like writing, I rewrite it.

  1. Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.
  2. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.
  3. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.
  4. Every sentence must do one of two things — reveal character or advance the action.
  5. Start as close to the end as possible.
  6. Be a Sadist. No matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them-in order that the reader may see what they are made of.
  7. Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.
  8. Give your readers as much information as possible as soon as possible. To hell with suspense. Readers should have such complete understanding of what is going on, where and why, that they could finish the story themselves, should cockroaches eat the last few pages.

  1. Put one word after another. Find the right word, put it down.
  2. Finish what you’re writing. Whatever you have to do to finish it, finish it.
  3. Put it aside. Read it pretending you’ve never read it before. Show it to friends whose opinion you respect and who like the kind of thing that this is.
  4. Remember: when people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work for them, they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong.
  5. Fix it. Remember that, sooner or later, before it ever reaches perfection, you will have to let it go and move on and start to write the next thing. Perfection is like chasing the horizon. Keep moving.
  6. Laugh at your own jokes.
  7. The main rule of writing is that if you do it with enough assurance and confidence, you’re allowed to do whatever you like. (That may be a rule for life as well as for writing. But it’s definitely true for writing.) So write your story as it needs to be written. Write it ­honestly, and tell it as best you can. I’m not sure that there are any other rules. Not ones that matter.

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